Do yourself a favor

Drive fans and Back to the Future fans, go do yourself a favor: download the Back to the Future sound track and play it when on your next drive. It is an amazing thrill. As the score builds, you feel your foot coming down a the pedals a harder and your eyes move to the speedometer and as the needle inch closer to 88mph – great Scott, what a rush.

In other news, there are these spectacular chips called “Rice Works”. Its rice chips pressed in a Dorrittos triangle shape. I’m eating the sweet chili flavored one – what these chips do to my taste buds is the same thing Journey does to my ear drums. My sister says she got them at Costco, so next time you’re out, pick up two bags… three in case you want one for yourself.

 

Why I haven’t been blogging…

1. Laziness – I would love to blog more, but in all fairness, my laziness was here before my blog. Seniority, what can you do?

2. Blogger’s block – its hard coming up with interesting content. I fear that this may allude to people thinking that I’m uninteresting. Oh, quite the contrary – I am very interesting, but I also like to keep to myself.

3. Morality – apparently plagiarism is heavily frowned upon – even outside the classroom!!! Where are people suppose to get ideas from, if not from other people? Who has the time to be creative anymore? Certainly not me. Do you know how long it takes to make a proper ham and roast beef sandwich? Not to mention the time eating the sandwich and call up all your friends bragging about what a great sandwich maker you are.

4. Counting – I started at one and have been going ever since. Its like there’s no end to it.

5. Learning Chinese – Is there anyone out there who can teach me how to say “Go back to your own country”? They don’t seem to understand when I say it in English or they give me dirty looks like I was some kind of a racist. Those silly Chinese…if they’re not inventing paper, gunpowder, or taking our jobs, they’re being silly.

6. Going on Job Interviews – I’ll tell you this, I’m the best and I deserve to be well compensated for it. I’m a people person; I love people. If I had a weakness, its that I care too much. Where do I see myself in 5 years? Hmm…management quite frankly.

 

TMNT review

Quick Summary: This movies seems to be a continuation of the original live action movies. The main plot of the movie is 3000 years ago, 5 generals/siblings bent on world domination opened a portal to grant them immortality. However, it released 13 horrible creatures and turned 4 of the 5 into stone. The legend has it that the portal can only be opened once every 3000 years. Cut to today, the remaining general intends to reopen the portal. The turtles are the only ones that can stand in the way of the Earth’s destruction, however, there has been a rift in the team. Can they pull themselves together in time to save the world?

My take: If you have kids and want to introduce them to one of your favorite childhood loves, go for it. Otherwise, wait for it to come on TV. If you’re a true turtles fan, I suppose you can rent it.

The CG was impressive. There was a scene where the turtles were rained on and it looked as good as anything I’ve seen in any other animated movie I’ve seen. Kids are going to want to buy the toys because it looked damn nice – believe me when I say that the merchandising on this movie will be huge. Action figures, cars, playsets…the studio is going to clean up with toy sales – which is the only reason why this movie was made to begin with. That or boost the lame non-canon tv show ratings.

The weakness is in the predictable plot, poor direction, and horrible dialog. All cartoon movies fell like an episode stretched out, and this was no exception. It felt like the director made this movie by pulling just two levers marked dramatic moment and comical moment and pulled them indiscriminately. There was also a button marked sarcastic dialog that he pressed in between. The story was just riddled with plot holes – some could’ve been patched with simple expletive dialog, but that would’ve gotten in the way flat exchanges between the heroes and villains. The turtles team rift plot was painfully drawn out. Anytime the main plot was being developed, they had to cut back to the B story for that dramatic beat and it was just overkill. The main plot pace I thought was was fine, but was built for a twist that was so obvious that it was almost condescending. Speaking of the main plot – it had me squirming in my seat biting my tongue dying to yell, “OH COME ON – WHY IS HE DOING THAT? THIS IS HORSE SHIT!!!”

I get that this was a kid’s movie, but there is definitely an older fan base that they could’ve tapped had they made it a tighter movie. But instead, they killed the story with a long first act with 3 back stories, undeveloped characters, cheesy snarkey remarks, and plot hole after plot hole. If the toys sell well enough, you can expect a squeal, which I wouldn’t be opposed to if they it gets decent writing and direction.

To sum it up: Skip it

 

Got to keep posting…interesting content be damned! DAMNED I SAY!

Here is a list of TV shows that I have been following. The numbers mean nothing – cause you can’t rank TV shows like they were friends (that list will come soon enough). There are no reviews, just listings and comments.

1. The office – I’m too invested in that “will they, won’t they?” tension that will eventually goes nowhere

2. Scrubs -been a lackluster season, but the dream sequences are too funny to miss
3. 30 Rock – its just plain funny

4. Veronica Mars…although I haven’t seen it since the first hiatus

5. Battlestar Galactica – if you didn’t know I was a geek before you read this…surprise

6. the Black Donnellys – love me the gangster/mob genre

7. Smallville – this has been off and on. I enjoy almost anything that involves superpowers, especially if its about superman. But often times, my fanboy-ness can’t get over how this show isn’t canon and for all intent and purposes, it is crap. Lana is good looking though – its been said before, but can it be said enough? No.

8. Heroes – show about people with super powers + geek = a lot of friday nights on fan forums rather than dating girls and drinking with my buddies

Honorable mentions:

South Park – I don’t catch the show when it comes out, but thats why we have bittorrent

ANTM – I catch it when I can, but its gotten so stale

Colbert Report/Daily Show

Conan O’Brien

 

Modesty

Modesty is a highly admirable trait, but its a shame that you can’t self describe yourself as being so.

Imagine someone asking you describe all your positive traits. You could respond, well I’m smart, funny, giving, selfless, considerate, honest, caring, modest- whoa now, hold it right there. We’re going to have to add liar at the top of  the list of your negative traits.

 

Zamondafication!

Would you rather spend 10 years in a minimum security prison or spend 5 years in a pound-you-in-the-ass prison?

10 years is an extremely long time…but 5 years of ass pounding, you’ll be a changed man.

 

Pet Names

I would like to own another dog so I can name it whatever I want. Name of choice: peeve – thay way, I can have a pet peeve that I love. Come to think of it, I’d like two dogs so I can name the other one Irony – then my love of irony will be genuine.

 

I wish I was Irish.

There’s a shirt at Urban Outfitters that reads “Fight me, I’m Irish”. I want it oh so much, but unfortunately I do not hail from the shores of Ireland. Is there not a shirt for the people of South East Asia? Why no shirt that reads “Build an elaborate network of tunnels with me, I’m Vietnamese”? My culture is critically underrepresented in the screened T-shirt industry.

It’s definitely a race issue. Clearly we do not have enough negative stereotypes that can translate to a badass tshirt. Being good at math isn’t really comparable to the fiery temper of the Irish. Small penis is good, but is not badass. “Wear your seatbelt with me while I’m driving, I’m Asian”…pretty funny, but I think taking the “bad driver” stereotype will upset the women (Zing!).

Could it be that the Vietnamese people are not as badass as I had thought?

 

NEW PODCAST IS UP!!!

Check out my new podcast at The website will host the show, photos, and a blog. But don’t worry, i’ll still use this one for personal stuff.

 

Truely…Man’s best friend

According to this highly credible and accurate article, dog owners lead much healthier lives than those that don’t. Since I own two dogs, that means I live a life twice has healthy. Men’s Fitness magazine…I waiting for your call to put me on the cover of the March issue.